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Mabeo is a member of Positive Connection, the only Internet dating forum geared to people with HIV in South Africa, the country with more infections – over 5 million and counting – than any other. I still haven’t found anyone I’ve gotten romantically involved with, but I’m carefully going through the list. AIDS is no longer an automatic killer here. As in the United States, it has become a chronic illness for those with access to antiretroviral drugs.
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Dating can be tricky for anyone, but if you are living with HIV, there are some extra things to think about. Two important things to consider are:. If you are looking for a positive partner, consider going to places online and in person where you will meet other people living with HIV. These include HIV-focused support groups, conferences, or dating websites such as www. For many women living with HIV, the big issue is disclosure.
How and when do you tell? There is no one easy or perfect way to tell someone you are living with HIV. Often, it is not how or when you tell, but whom you tell. Similarly, if a person is going to accept you and your diagnosis, timing of disclosure may not matter as long as you tell before having sex. You may wish to wait to disclose your status until after a sexual encounter for fear of rejection or embarrassment. There are several reasons why it may be safer for you NOT to do this:.
Some women living with HIV find it hard to think about dating because they feel less desirable or less appealing than HIV-negative women. It is important to remember that there is much more to you than HIV.
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Ben Sassman, founder of the website, said “normal” dating sites do not however, like to expand, increase traffic and take the site into Africa.
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This paper examines the approaches heterosexual men and women in South Africa use to engage their partners in discussions of HIV and risk factors in their relationships. These strategies entail balancing the risks of infection while managing the challenges of maintaining a relationship. In a context in which there is a great deal of insecurity in relationships it is especially challenging to discuss HIV risks with partners. Our findings reveal that concerns about children or the desire to have children provided a legitimate basis for discussing HIV risk with partners.
The focus of these discussions is on the future for their children. Research in South Africa should attend to men’s and women’s desires to have and to raise children.
In the high-prevalence countries of southern Africa, young women African heterosexual men are themselves vulnerable to HIV infection and.
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If it does not matter to you whether your partner is positive or negative, you can focus more on traditional methods – singles events, places of.
Join and create your free profile today to see how well you match with her, and hundreds more. Online: More than 6 months ago. Modified: More than 6 months ago. Mobile number not yet verified. Ask her to add you as a favourite. Contact Her. The SA Government would rather scare people correctly. Why the stigma? If you have it – you will know that it is the most difficult thing to disclose. So you meet someone and get on really well with them – but then theres the big “Do I? Do you spend weekends and Friday nights on your own because the trauma of disclosing?
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For the past few years, people have been able to hook up through the Positive Connection, a website offering dating services for HIV sufferers. The service is the brainchild of Ben Sassman, a salesman living in Johannesburg. A few years ago, two of his friends told him they were HIV positive and that they had trouble dating. When they revealed their status, women invariably fled.
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But his contribution turned out to be significant. The website has more than registered members today, one of the biggest of its kind worldwide, with members from Thailand to Kenya. The Johannesburg businessman, who provides stone for road building, said he never expected such a huge response. I’m happy to have done what I can. At what point do you tell somebody who you like that you are HIV-positive? He said if he told girls his status, they would run away. Sassman’s solution was to set up a site where disclosure was no longer an issue.
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